De-cluttering: Choosing Not to Justify

Before we get into actual de-cluttering of our life and home, we are going to be honest about our justification of what we allow in our minds, lives and homes. You cannot lose the mess and stress until you stop justifying everything.

For example, a student failed a test. She knew she would be having the test, but after failing it completely blamed the teacher. She said it was not her fault because the teacher did not teach. The question I asked: if she had a book and notes to study. She said yes but chose not to use them. So can she justify failing because she did not have the best teacher, but had all the resources?

A young wife and mom becomes addicted to a TV show about a young single woman. The young woman is living what looks to be the perfect life. She has the cutest and most romantic boyfriend. She is a successful business woman. She spends every night going out and having fun. The young mom never misses an episode and talks about the character all the time like she is a real person. The mom says there is no harm in this show. She justifies watching it because it comes on at 7 p.m. and nothing bad comes on that early. But eventually she is dressing like the character and starts acting like her. Sadly, she eventually even falls for a man and cheats on her husband. After months of justifying the show and denying the effects, her whole life fell apart.

A family has a dream of owning a home. They want a home with lots of room. Due to the easiness of qualifying for a mortgage they buy their dream home even though they know it is really more than they can afford. They justify by saying they will be making more next year or they will use it to serve God by opening it to others. Once they have the home they run up credit cards to buy all new furniture. They justify it again. Now they can never enjoy their home because they are stressing on how to pay all the bills.

A person looks at pornography on the computer. He justifies it as a moment of weakness. A couple years later looks at it again justifying it to himself as a result of stress. But this time a job is lost because of the addiction.

A house is covered in laundry and clutter. In some rooms you can barely walk. A stay at home mom justifies not picking up because she needs to be with the kids. But she watches every Soap Opera that comes on TV.

Credit Card debt is now higher than their income. They are continuing to spend money on things for themselves and for others. They never take the time to have a budget. They live beyond their means. They justify it because they are buying all this stuff because it makes them and their kids happy. Yet they are so miserable now because of the financial stress.

A sixteen year old kid decides after growing up in church, he will no longer go. The parent blames the youth minister for not reaching out enough. But the parent has not one time in sixteen years prayed with their child or spent anytime developing their child's spiritual walk.

All of the above stories are true. I could give a name or names to each of them. You may be able to give names to some of them. It may be your own name.

I share each of the stories for a reason. We as a society have become professionals on justifying our actions. We justify so we do not have to admit we have made a bad choice. We all make bad choices. We have made choices based on what the world says is ok, not God. That alone has become our biggest justification.

I plead with you to not justify anymore actions as we continue to de-clutter. Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit not the lies of the enemy. If you are making an excuse in your head why it is ok to watch a show full of sex scenes then you are trying to justify your actions. If it requires an excuse then you probably need to stop or change what you are doing.

Go back over the questions and the last blog. Choose not to justify, but listen to God and His truth. And the next couple of blogs do the same. Maybe you need to go back and read more again because you were justifying your actions and thoughts.

We must choose to stop justifying and stop this cycle. The next generation has already started justifying their actions, thoughts and even disrespect. If it is not Christ like we cannot justify it any more. And praise God for shedding his blood so we may be forgiven and for His grace.

De-cluttering the Mind

How much is too much? TV? Music? News? Fictional Books? Does it really affect our mind and thoughts? Does fantasy change our reality? Or can we watch and listen to anything without consequences? Is all that info in our minds doing us any good?

We could debate a lot of these things. But for now I want to only approach what is in your mind and see if it needs de-cluttering and reorganization itself.

Answer these questions: how many secular songs can you sing by heart? How many lines can you quote from TV or movies? How many scenes can you reenact or describe in detail? How many passwords and phone numbers are stored in your mind? How many issues are you stressing over in your mind right now? How many scriptures can you quote? How many scriptures enter your mind when facing trials?

If the last two questions have the lowest number then you have a mind that needs de-cluttering. If it is even the same amount then you still have a problem.

Your mind is filled with so much info. Someone has been filling it with something since you were born. But unfortunately somewhere along the way, filling it with God's Word took a back seat. And some of us are really good at memorizing something only for the moment, just long enough to pass the test. Yet, we remember and store in our mind useless or only wanted information. It is time to de-clutter and fill our heads with tools.

1. Choose to memorize scripture.
Either as a family or with a friend. Memorize and engrave God's Word in your mind. Scripture is the sword and you will need it for battle. And you and I both know you will have battles and temptations. Why not be prepared? Would go to war without a weapon? Would you fight a bear or lion with nothing? Of course not. This is not an option either.

2. Choose to limit and/or stop the junk.
I am not going to list specific shows, books or movies. The one thing that is not an option and cannot be justified is porn on any level. If that is filling your mind daily or occasionally, repent and find some accountability to completely avoid it.
If what you watch, read or listen to causes you to lust, covet, stumble, have hatred, sexually impure thoughts, use foul language, or anything that is a sin even if it is just in your mind...stop watching it, stop reading it, stop listening to it.
You may have to check yourself as you watch or read certain things. You may be so acclimated that you do not realize how they cause you to sin. You may covet a relationship on TV, you may think too often of your favorite male character, you may sing a song filled with lustful thoughts because you like the style. The enemy is deceitful and full of tricks. He is using all these things to cause you to sin and bring you further into the world and further away from God. What junk do you need out of your mind?

3. Choose to fill it up with love, truth and joy.
We all too quickly fill our minds with lies. We believe the worst in ourselves, our lives, and others. We must know the truth about who we are in Christ in our minds. We must fill our minds with the truth about His love. And we must fill our minds with everything we have to be thankful for each day.
Put a note on your bathroom mirror or dashboard reminding you of these things. Let them soak up in your mind every day.

4. Choose to give God your burdens and stress.
I hate to ask, but how much time of the day do you and I spend worrying? Why do those worries consume our thoughts? We do not have to carry these burdens. They do not have to consume our every waking moment. When those worries and stresses come, we have to choose not to worry. Lift it up to God in prayer. It may mean every five minutes, but we have to choose to give it to God. We have to trust in Him. We cannot let the worry consume us because we might miss His answer to the problem.

(you can use one of these to memorize first):

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

Colossians 3:2

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

1 Peter 1:13

Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.'^a]">[a]

Matthew 22:37

But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.

2 Corinthians 11:3

²⁵"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? ²⁶Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^[a]?

²⁸"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? ³¹So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' ³²For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.Matthew 6:25-34

Decluttering: Choosing What Consumes Our Minds, Lives and Homes

First let me apologize for being a week behind. But I am glad to be back and am ready to de-clutter.

We are going to start by taking a survey of what consumes our thoughts, lives and homes. I encourage you to write down your answers or save them on your computer. You will need to look back at them throughout the week. What is filling our minds, lives and homes can strengthen us or cause us a lot of stress. I want to help you find strength instead of mess and stress.

Let's began our survey:

1. What music do you listen to the most? (classical, country, rap, rock, soothing, praise and worship) How much time a day do you listen to it?
2. What do you watch ? (news, comedy, dramas, reality, horror, sci-fi, home channels, educational, sports, youtube, porn)How much time a week do you watch TV, movies, or something on the computer?
3. What do you read? (bible, devotionals, romance, thrillers, drama, true stories, fiction, non-fiction, religious) How much time do you spend reading of each?
4. What type of friends give you the most advice? (non-christian, christian, an active follower of Christ)
5. How much time do you sit and be quiet and listen for God?
6. How much time do you spend at home between 7 am and 10 pm?
7. How much time do you spend driving in the car?
8. How much sleep do you average a night?
9. How many activities besides work and school are you and/or your family members involved in? How many hours does it involve a week? (be accurate it and add it up.)
10. What are your priorities in the week? (extra activities, family, work, school, home, church, etc)
11. If you answered church to number ten, why is it a priority and what are you doing while there?
12. How much time do you exercise in a week?
13. How many sit down family meals do you eat a week?
14. How much time do you take for yourself a week?
15. How much time do you spend picking out clothes? (OK that one was just to be funny)
16. What is on the floors in your house?
17. Where is your laundry?
18. Where do you keep all the movies and video games?
19. How many dirty dishes are in your sink right now?
20. Do you know where the remote is?
21. Can you open a closet door without something falling on you?
22. Where in your house has the most clutter? (bedroom, living room, kitchen, garage)
23. When is the last time you went through things and got rid of things you have not used the past year?
24. What place to you hate to be in your house because of stuff?
25. Do you buy things because you like them or need them? Do you justify why you need them?

I hope you were honest so we can look at these things the next few days. I would love to know some of your answers to help me be more specific the rest of the week. You can anonymously put your answers on comments at the end of the blog. Make sure you answer all questions and are specific. We will began de-cluttering tomorrow.

Coming Soon...

I am so sorry I am running behind on writing this week. I enjoy writing but I have had to take care of a sick little one. I hope by tonight or tomorrow to post this week's study. It will be on Decluttering the mind, life and home.

Choose Today

My favorite movie is "Gone With the Wind." What I love a lot about the movie and Miss Scarlet, she has several flaws. And one of her flaws she still has at the end of the movie. As the love of her life leaves her, she says I cannot think about that today, I will think about it tomorrow. She chooses to put things off and deal with it at another time. Why not choose today?

I want to ask you a question. Have you been reading this blog? Have you been changing your choices? Are you listening to God as he speaks and are you obeying? Or are you waiting? Do you choose to wait? Are you waiting for tomorrow or the next day? Are choosing to put it off? Why not choose today?

Today, you will choose:

1. To talk to God.
2. To read God's Word.
3. To smile.
4. To exercise.
5. To play and have fun.
6. To find joy in God.
7. To eat something healthy.
8. To take fifteen to twenty minutes and do a quick pick up of the house.
9. To discuss and pray about my kids week with my kids.
10. To focus on your blessings.

You already may be griping about the long list. You can talk to God in the car, home or office. I will have scripture for you to read. Smiling comes from finding joy in God and thinking of the blessings in your life. You can exercise and play with the kids while picking up the house. Turn the laundry hamper and toy box into a basketball goal and play away while picking up. You have to eat, just make sure to eat some veggies and fruit. Your kids are going to tell you about the drama of the day. Just lead the discussion on how you can pray for them and find teachable moments in the discussion. It is not hard. It does not take that much time or add anything to your list. Choose today. No more waiting until tomorrow like Miss Scarlet.

Here is a scripture you can use to praise God for who He is and what He has done.

Psalm 96
1 Sing to the LORD a new song;sing to the LORD, all the earth.
2 Sing to the LORD, praise his name; proclaim his salvation day after day.
3 Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples.
4 For great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; he is to be feared above all gods.
5 For all the gods of the nations are idols, but the LORD made the heavens.
6 Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and glory are in his sanctuary.
7 Ascribe to the LORD, O families of nations, ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.
8 Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name;bring an offering and come into his courts.
9 Worship the LORD in the splendor of his holiness; tremble before him, all the earth.
10 Say among the nations, "The LORD reigns." The world is firmly established, it cannot be moved; he will judge the peoples with equity.
11 Let the heavens rejoice, let the earth be glad; let the sea resound, and all that is in it;
12 let the fields be jubilant, and everything in them. Then all the trees of the forest will sing for joy;
13 they will sing before the LORD, for he comes, he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness and the peoples in his truth.

Choose Respect

Was it when you looked in the mirror, put on your clothes, fixed your hair, maybe even before you got out of bed, got mad at another, when did you roll your eyes at yourself? How many times in a day do you dislike something about yourself? How many times did it affect your mood?

Too many people, especially women, do not like themselves. You may not like the way you look, the way you act or where you are spiritually. You get mad and become your biggest critic. And some of you have been mad at yourself for so long, you may even be depressed. It is time to get out of this endless cycle of beating ourselves up and make choices that respect ourselves.

It doesn't matter if you are 100 lbs or 600 lbs. It doesn't matter if you picked up a bible yesterday or a year ago. It doesn't matter if the last vegetable you ate was last night or last week. It doesn't matter if your tongue slipped this morning or everyday. Today we will make a choice to respect ourselves. Today we will choose to treat ourselves like a child of God.

My dear sweet friend, you are a daughter or son of God. You are royalty. Your body, mind, heart and soul belong to God. Now, we have to choose to treat ourselves like we are God's child. It is time we should see ourselves as a child of God when we look in the mirror.

1. Choose to exercise, get rest and eat right.
We have discussed the importance of this in a previous blog. I want to say it again. You have to choice to take care of your physical body and health. It affects you. Not just risking the chance of a heart attack but your attitude. Daily exercise with the right nutrients helps you feel better. You have more energy and will be in a better mood. When you look in the mirror you will see a person who takes care of his/her physical health. You will gain respect for yourself.

2. Choose to fill your yourself carefully.
You have to limit the amount of worldly influence on your mind. Be very careful on what and how much you watch. We constantly hear about how skinny models and actors are providing a negative influence. But have you realized how much you might be comparing yourself or your life to a character on TV, in a book or in a movie. You compare your life to another one. You desire to have that spouse, that home, that affair. Your happiness with your own life is measured by how others seem happy in theirs (whether fiction or reality). It is a very sneaky trap that catches us and makes us unhappy with our own lives.
The only thing that is going to fill that emptiness is Christ, not another person or more stuff. You cannot experience true joy without Christ. You need to fill your mind with God's truth. You need to open your heart to God's love and refill it daily.
The longer you keep trying to fill that emptiness with other things, the longer you will feel miserable. You are God's child and need to be filled with your Father's love. It a precious gift from God. Take it.

3. Choose to see forgiveness.
You are human. You have a free will. You will mess up. But once you do, seek forgiveness from Christ and forgive yourself. Do not let the enemy hold it over your head. When you look in the mirror see God's forgiven child, not your past sins.

4. Choose to remember who you are.
When you look in the mirror today, remind yourself that you are a child of God. You are His princess/prince. Now, go live your life today as a child of God.

5. Choose to do these steps daily.
As you began to take care of yourself physically and spiritually, you will feel much better. You will respect yourself because you have made better choices as a child of God.

"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!"

1 John 3:1

"5Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace;"

Romans 8:5-6

Choose love

You know you are to choose to love God with all your heart, soul and mind. You know you are to choose to love your neighbor and your enemies. But today I want to talk about choosing to let yourself be loved.

We want to be loved. Actually we desire greatly to be loved. Yet we have become really good at convincing ourselves we do not deserve to be loved or that no one really loves us. As crazy as it may sound, the reason we feel so unloved may be because of our own choice. (Now if you are in a mentally or physically abusive relationship, it is not your fault and you do not deserve it. You need to get of it and get help from family, friends and authorities if necessary.)

One choice that hinders us from feeling loved is choosing to only focus on how another does not show love to us. They may climb the highest mountain for us most days, but we only remember the time they left us in the pit. Be careful not to be good at only remembering the negative parts of your relationship. Choose to remember the times you know without a doubt they loved you.
In the movie, "Enchanted," a couple is going through a nasty, bitter divorce. Once someone else points out how sad is it that they have forgotten about their love, they finally remember that they love each other and why. Have you become like that couple in a relationship? Do you start to only see their faults in loving you that you stop letting them love you or let yourself be loved by them?

Another choice that hinders us from being loved is choosing to believe the lie of the enemy that we are unlovable. Your past is so bad and too many mistakes have been made that no one can ever really love you. My friend, that is a lie. Yes, you may have made mistakes. You need to seek forgiveness from those affected by your mistakes. But others will still love you. We are all sinners saved by grace. And part of that grace is love.
I want you to hear this loud and clear. No sin can separate you from God's love. He already showed you how much He loves you. Christ paid the price for your sins. He paid the price because He already knew you would make mistakes. He loved you so much that He was willing to take your punishment. He loved you then and loves you today and will love you tomorrow. Choose to believe God over the enemy. You are His daughter/son and He loves you.

When we do not get what we want, we sometimes choose to believe that God or some person does not love us . It may be infertility, finances, unemployment, losing your house or losing a loved one that keeps us from believing God loves us. All of those things are horrible. I am sorry you are facing those trials. Again, it is not because God does not love you. If God did not love you or me, he would have never died for us. God would let us take the punishment of death for our sins. We will face trails and challenges in this life, but those challenges do not reflect His love for us. A Heavenly Father who will comfort the brokenhearted, provide for those in need is how He reflects His love. You may never get the answer you want, but you have to choose to trust in Your Father's love and will for your life. Instead of denying His love, open yourself to receive His love that will help you through your suffering.

1. Choose to see how others love you even in little ways.
2. Choose to remember how much Christ loved you when He hung on the cross.
3. Choose to find strength in His love when facing trials.
4. Choose to feel your Father's arms around you.

Psalm 139
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

"1 O LORD, you have searched me

and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;

you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue

you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;

you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;

if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me

and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;

the night will shine like the day,

for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,

they would outnumber the grains of sand.

When I awake, I am still with you."

"35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:35-39